Life consists not in holding good cards but in playing those you hold well. Josh Billings

I just want to take the time out to point out the obvious and say, I'm Blessed. I am blessed because...

I have the best mom and dad in the world. They support me and have guided me in the right direction my whole life. Even though we don't always see eye to eye, I can always count on them to be there and go to bat for me. I might not always like what they have to say but 99.9% of the time, they're right. Even the times I might not see it at that moment.

My grandmother is one of a kind. She is the only grandmother I have ever had and I would not trade her for any other grandmother in the world. Even if your grandmother makes you cookies and spends all her money on you, mine is still better. I miss the summers I spent at her house. I recently visited her house in LC to get some things I had left years ago, and the house still smells like bacon and coffee. That smell=LOVE.

My nephew, brother, sister-in-law, her sister, and their mom make life fun. We are always laughing and making any situation better than ever possible. The time spent with them is priceless and I'm so proud to be apart of their world. They can turn any bad day around when I'm so far down I don't know which way is up.

My boyfriend is amazing and supportive. I love his personality and the way he can always make me smile. We have such a good time together. I met him by chance and it has been a great four months. I never knew how great a relationship could be, until I met him. I truly believe that nothing happens for a reason and I'm so grateful God brought him into my life.

I can always turn to my friends and other family members, no matter what the situation. God has put me in such a great place with friends and family that love me through thick and thin. I would not trade the moments and memories made for anything. They have helped make me into the person I am today and I love them for sharing their lives with me.

I just wanted to take the time out to express how grateful I am and thank God for all He has blessed me with.

ann anise.

It seems like the simplest concept: just push them all away and you’ll never get hurt.

 

However, the simplest isn’t always the most effective.

Someday, somebody’s going to find their way in, and they’re going to leave you on your knees.

nise.

It may have just been a moment to you, but it changed every single one that followed for me. Ian Thomas

          A few things should be pointed out here, and I'm not saying any of these things because I have countless thoughts running through my head, although the multitude of thoughts are slowly driving me crazy, anyone would point out the same if they were the one in my shoes. By all means, try to follow this erratic writting session, but fair warning now.

          Learning a life lesson is never fun. Actually, it's about as much fun as if your parents took you to the county fair and made you sit from afar while you watched the other kids play. However, if the county fair was anything like the one in Lincolnton, you wouldn't have missed much. But that's beside the point.

          Trusting someone, anyone for that matter, after you have learned a few life lessons can seem like an act of Congress. No, I do not believe in making people in your present and future pay for the mistakes of the many who did not make it further than your past. However, that mantra can be hard to follow at times. 

          Recently, it has come to my attention that I know a good number of people but most never really touch me. The reason for that is because I do not let people get close enough to where they could hurt me. My wall is up 99.9% of the time, unless I find myself at a breaking point. At that moment, and only then, is when I choose to talk to family or a close friend about why my hardened heart has melted like a Hershey's candy bar left out in the sun on the hottest day of summer.

          I understand this is no way to act but up until recently, I never cared enough to even want to try and let someone in. I know you can't imagine it right now but rolling my eyes in sarcasm at the very thought of the quote, "& Then you meet that one person and your life is changed," was a daily thing. And just like anything else, that came back to bite me in the butt. Oh, the life lessons learned, on top of meeting someone by chance, plus that one random person changing your world, and in turn making your guard come tumbling down like the Berlin Wall, 1989.

ann anise.

A Like Letter- I Think Thats What I Like Best.

Dear You,

I didn't even realize you were on my mind until my phone lit up with your name. I smiled, and said to my empty bedroom, "Oh, hello you!"

I like how it's almost impossible for me to keep my emotions to myself while you're telling a story. I want to throw my hands in the air; one to cover my mouth and the other held out in front of me as if to say, Stop! You can't be serious! I like that we both cant help but smile when we look at each other.

"Only if you want to," I say.

"I do, but only if you want to"

"No sir, its up to you"

I like how I don't have to wonder -- or worry, for that matter -- where we're going. We both know its in Gods hands. Not many trust that. I'm proud of us; we're happy just being ourselves; and being ourselves works really great together.

I like how we can say ridiculous things and not be embarrassed. I like that I get to act like I'm living in a movie and you just continue to be the sweetest person. I like that you know the answers I don't, even if I have to pull them out of you. That you let me bust your chops, and you mine. That we grew up a lot, and now we get to be this.

I think maybe that's what I like best.

Like,

Me