A Like Letter- I Think Thats What I Like Best.

Dear You,

I didn't even realize you were on my mind until my phone lit up with your name. I smiled, and said to my empty bedroom, "Oh, hello you!"

I like how it's almost impossible for me to keep my emotions to myself while you're telling a story. I want to throw my hands in the air; one to cover my mouth and the other held out in front of me as if to say, Stop! You can't be serious! I like that we both cant help but smile when we look at each other.

"Only if you want to," I say.

"I do, but only if you want to"

"No sir, its up to you"

I like how I don't have to wonder -- or worry, for that matter -- where we're going. We both know its in Gods hands. Not many trust that. I'm proud of us; we're happy just being ourselves; and being ourselves works really great together.

I like how we can say ridiculous things and not be embarrassed. I like that I get to act like I'm living in a movie and you just continue to be the sweetest person. I like that you know the answers I don't, even if I have to pull them out of you. That you let me bust your chops, and you mine. That we grew up a lot, and now we get to be this.

I think maybe that's what I like best.

Like,

Me

The LORD will fight for you, you need only be still. Exodus 14:14

We've all been there, the days when you would rather beat your head against the wall than to deal with the reality of whats really going on around you. The fact that I have no control of the outcome, when the situation is about me, puts me under more stress. Still, not as much stress as the week to come. Here comes the waiting...oh joy! The past four days of my life have been this, and the adult world only offers promises of more of the same. Can't we just rewind to just a few days before when life was simple- when things just fell into place without effort? Because that's exactly what it was- effortless, because it fell into place like it was meant to be that way. Feeling sorry for yourself is not an option because it's horribly pointless. You're a big girl! BUT...There's always a but. For me, the emotional byproduct of the situation hasn't been feeling sorry for myself. No woe is me. Rather, it's been an intense feeling of missing, and not understanding. It's not gloomy out right now, which if it was, it would be the perfect backdrop for feeling nostalgic and for casting a perfectly rosy glow on a perfectly imperfect time in my life.

I'm okay with this because I have put things in Gods hands. Most of my prayers have been answered. Today in church I had another question answered, and in my heart I know...He alone knows the outcome, and soon enough I will have other answers I need. I put all of my trust in Him.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

Always & Forever,

Ann-Anise.

Patience is trusting Gods timing. & His timing couldn't have been any more perfect for this situation

As I have stated before I try not to write about the current romantic climate of my life to protect my own interests. Omission saves relationships from too much scrutiny, spares the people themselves from being too aware of my tendencies to over-think, and it protects me from over-exposing a rare but sometimes too-tender heart. BUT for anyone to understand what I'm talking about I first have to say- I met the family.

I met most all of the family. Which I must say was a lot of fun, and I enjoyed myself.
Then the next day I met...the grandpa.
Now don't judge me by this topic but it made a big impression on me.
Some people will need a time line in order to understand or accept how I felt.
I guess I never thought it should matter if I knew this man five days, five years, or only for the five seconds it took for him to hug and kiss me in the same way my grandpa did years ago. It wasn't enough that he looked like my grandpa...he even hugged and kissed me the same way.
I was taken back- with a tinge of sadness; there doesn't have to be a reason or a number to justify that.

I was grandpa's doll. I was the first granddaughter- the one who rode on the tracker with him through the pastures. He bought me my first horse...just because I asked him to. I took his shoes and socks off every night after he came in from a long day. I was the one holding his right hand when he died. He was the only one I hugged around his neck and he gave me a kiss at the same time.

up until that moment.

Always & Forever,

Ann-Anise.

Be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead! I Peter 1:6

This would be my sister-in-law/best friend Kristina. & This is also the woman that will be making me an AUNT 2/2011. I'm so happy to announce my best friend that married my brother 3/2010 is now having a baby!

Yes > that would be the first sign of the newest addition to the family. I'm so excited :)

The fact that my brother has a child on the way is so far out, I can hardly stand it. He will be a great, if absurd, daddy. I assume that has a great deal to do with his wife's firm and loving touch.

Our family is blessed.

"Be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead!"

-I Peter 1:6

Always & Forever,

Ann-Anise.